Oscar left a hole in my heart

We lost our Oscar on the 6th September 2023. He had been my faithful companion since he was born 12 years ago. He was beautiful. He fathered several beautiful puppies with our female Maltese and our Chihuahua. They were gorgeous and all went to family and friends with no charge. Oscar’s last daughter Kirby passed away just after him last year.
Oscar was blind, deaf, had several teeth missing, lost his sense of smell and had a skin condition and arthritis in his rear legs and spine. He moved slower but still had that cheeky spark in his eye. He loved to play with his toys and loved to go for long walks. He also enjoyed interacting with our two chickens, Brenda and Phyllis.
I missed him so much I went into depression and have been treated for it ever since he passed away in my arms. He would sit next to me in the lounge and we would talk. Or rather he would listen and I’d discuss my day. I felt so close and bonded with my Beautiful Oscar. The neighbours knew him well. Despite being blind he did manage to wander off occasionally. He would be found and I’d go pick him up. He always had a smile on his face. And his rescuers always wanted to keep him and thought he was still a puppy. He has travelled quite a bit of Australia with me. He loved to go in the car and sit between the seats staring out the windscreen, tongue lolling out.
We are 66 and 79. Oscar was unique. He was loyal and kind, yet protective. I need another Oscar. I miss him terribly but I think he can come back, reincarnated for me in another beautiful furry friend. God bless you Oscar. Come back to me. I need you. 🤗💜🙏